Posted in Fateha's Journey, Global Developmental Delay

to toilet we will go

recently on the bus, when we were on our way home, an old lady who had a little girl in her lap kept looking at us. me and fateha. i smiled at her and she gave me a sneer. fine. she stared at fateha, up and down. and looking furiously at fateha’s crotch area.

old lady: how old is she?
me: just turned 4 *smiled*
old lady: and she’s still wearing diapers?
me: yes.
old lady: she *pointing to her grand daughter* will turn 4 also but in september. and NOT wearing diapers anymore.
me: *smiled*

good job to that mother who managed to train a little kid to pee independently. i know i did a lousy job for not training her enough. i remembered the first time, mid last year when she was 3, i tried putting her onto the toilet seat, telling her to pee. and i squatted right in front of her just to make sure she leak. which of course, she didn’t.

gave her a prep talk and explaining the pee-into-the-toilet-bowl job to a micro preemie who’s diagnosed with Global Developmental Delay (GDD) was not easy. she kept saying yes yes yes but pee pee pee she did in her pants. tried again but no progress made so i gave up. lousy mom, i was.

this year, i mean yesterday, i rolled up my sleeves and prepared myself. no way was i ever gonna let her wear diapers for so long. i’ve set my target: by the time she turn 5 next Jan, she’ll be diaper free. yes, i’m giving it a year. at the rate we’re going (i’m working, so it’s not helping much) and the volume of pee she leaks, a short term goal is not possible.

though she has GDD, her speech and understanding of commands is fairly good. and it has become so much better ever since she turned 4. so i talked to her and got her to respond to me.

me: i’m not putting on a diaper for you, ok?
her: ok! cannot pee here *points at her panties*
me: call me if you want to pee.
her: ibu, i want to pee!
me: good!

the first hour of diaper-free went very well. she was dry and didn’t call me or hubby. so instead, we had to call her out. kept asking her every 5 minutes. she shook her head and probably got tired of answering us. WE HAD TO! sorry, darling. and when she finally said, “uhh! WET!!” we knew instantly that an accident happened. and after changing and telling her, she peed in her shorts, yet again. and again. and again.

we had many wet panties and shorts chucked into the corner of the toilet for washing. my patience was thinning! hubby was furious. but i knew, i couldn’t afford to give up.

i discussed with her that she was only allowed to wear a diaper when she sleep at night. and she agreed. so this morning, right after washing her up, she was back into the diaper-free regime. exactly like yesterday, the first hour was dry. she called out to me, i checked and she was dry. so i sat her up on the seat and she peed. praised and encouraged, i did. got her to tell hubby that she managed to pee in the toilet bowl.

so far, today, it went quite well. only 2 accidents so far. she tells me when she FEELS like peeing. now that’s more like it, isn’t it? but i have to put her on the diaper when she naps because…accidents on the mattress would blow me up into a mean, green monster.



a wife, a mother, an anxious-for-no-reason person and a pure lazy bum.

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